I thought it was about time to spice up this blog so I thought I’d share with you an experience I had a few days ago. For maximum mojo, we need to be balanced – physically, emotionally and spiritually. That last point I may not have mentioned prior to arriving in Bali 6 weeks ago.
Before I start, I just want to give you a quick background. I had very little idea about energy healing before I went to this session in Bali. I know we are walking bundles of energy; our brain comprises around 100 billion neurons, our central nervous system is a network of electrical signals that transport information, and our heart keeps going with electrical signals from within the heart muscle. I’ve experienced my own energy field. As for energy healing? I’ve not had much experience with that one. I’m just trying and testing things that Bali has to offer. When in Rome… (yes, do go on).
A friend of mine recommended me this healer. She’s done a load of similar work on herself and it really intrigued me. It intrigued me as I’m aware I have various emotional blockages holding me back from living an extraordinary life. I’m not one to settle for mediocre. Call it fear, call it procrastination, call it limiting beliefs, call it self-sabotage, call it what you like. We all have a story about why we’re not doing something, whether it’s business-related, health-related, relationship-related – or anything else for that matter!
So I wanted to try this energy healing malarkey. I was told it was a kind of massage, but not exactly a relaxing one. You can say that again.
When I entered the room, I half expected the Western approach – for him to tell me to remove my shirt after he left the room, to get under a giant towel (me that is, not him – that would be weird) and for me to let him know as and when I was ready so he could re-enter the room. What was I thinking? I’m in Bali.
On this occasion, he stood behind the bench facing me and said: “Take off all your clothes and lie face down.” He didn’t disappear, nor look away. What do you do in this situation? Get awkward and run in the opposite direction? I’d driven this far, wasn’t turning back. He was recommended to me by a friend I trust, so I chose to trust him.
I lay face down looking at an empty bowl wondering what concoction of awesomeness I’d soon be inhaling from it. I lay there inhaling the incense that was smoking and noticed quite a few candles burning. He proceeded to smother me in oil and rub it in with brute force – at which point I started to wish I was back in Sweden experiencing the relaxing hands of a hot blonde. Not this time.
He covered me in some kind of scrub. After that, he started chucking some kind of liquid over me. It reminded me of a scene in a movie when the baddies would douse a house in fuel from a can before setting fire to it. I asked what it was and he said “pure alcohol”. Great! How about moving that flame a little further away from the bench? I chose to trust. He told me it was to allow the energy to move freely around the body. Ok…I guess I’ll just have to go with you on that one.
Having rubbed in alcohol to my whole body he focused a considerable amount of time on my feet – and my word it was painful. He kept on hitting what felt like a knot in my foot and told me that that was my stomach. I felt like saying: “No man, that’s my foot.” As it happens, I had prior knowledge of reflexology and went with it. Pulling at my toes and ramming his fingers in between them I started dropping off to sleep. Not.
My legs were next. Please make this less painful I thought to myself. Na ah. Elbows this time. Elbows all over the insides of my legs slipping about all over my ridiculously oily skin getting dangerously close to my derriere. I clenched, naturally. He noticed and told me to relax. Relax? I have a man sliding all over my naked legs with his pointy elbows? How can I relax? I felt more relaxed when I had a bear sitting on my lap licking my neck a few weeks ago.
After a significant time of oily elbows and brutal hands on my legs and back, he told me to turn over. Turn over? You mean you want me to lay facing upwards with my gentleman vegetables in full view? Sure, when in Bali. (Yes, do go on…)
This time I kept my eyes open – at least at the beginning. Who wouldn’t? Sure enough, he slapped more oil all over me, more scrub and got his can of alcohol out and proceeded to douse me in what I imagined to be petrol, but was only pure alcohol. Only. Surrounded by naked flames – so relaxing. Never been so relaxed in my life.
Back to my feet. Now with apparatus and what looked like a giant extremely pointed crayon made from lead. This time he was going from toe to toe poking me super hard explaining that the pain was related to various organs in my body – like my heart and brain. Thinking I’m physically fit, I expressed concern and he said it doesn’t necessarily mean their physical health – it can be more about emotional trauma; heartache, overly analytical mind etc. That kinda made sense. Stomach? Who knows. Lungs fine apparently, ears fine, eyes fine. Penis fine! Yes, he said that and chuckled. I hope he was chuckling at his own words and nothing else.
After more torture, I finally got to relax – because his phone rang. His hands were no longer on my body, for a brief moment. He chatted away on the phone as I was lying there doused in petrol, (in my head), surrounded by fire, feeling pretty vulnerable to say the least.
Within a few moments he turned his attention back to me. He told me to breathe deeply. Finally, the relaxing part, I was cool with this. I know how to breathe deeply, I do it fairly regularly. As I started to breathe deeply I shut my eyes and was aware he moved away from me, and returned holding a flame over me. He then told me to trust. Wow. You’re really pushing it Sunny Jim. Ok, I’ll trust…
I proceeded to breathe deeply as he passed a naked flame all over me healing me ridding me of negativity and fear (apparently). It felt kinda cool, I must admit. I just let him do whatever he had to do (within reason…) I shut my eyes and relaxed. Just as I was drifting off I was brought back from a drowsy slumber – by a hard punch to the centre of my rib cage. This guy was full of surprises!
I’m cutting a 1.5 hours session very short here. Similar punches and beatings went on for about 5-10 minutes. My head massage was next. Awesome! I love head massages! No…not this one! The most brutal rearrangement of what’s left of my hair follicles I’ve ever experienced.
The final few minutes were pretty relaxing I must admit as he said his prayers and as I was saying “Om” on the exhale a few times and also repeating my name in my head – on his request. I don’t just do that normally. I might do though, from now on.
Finally I was sat up, and he got a shot of alcohol for us to cheers to and drink. Coconut apparently.
All in all, an enlightening experience. The hour drive home on my scooter during rush hour was interesting to say the least. Am I healed? There’s no way of knowing. Am I relaxed? Hell yeah. Would I recommend it? Sure, I think we should try everything once (as long as it’s safe). We are all energy after all, so it makes sense to balance.
In fact, I even tried another form of energy healing the next day. When in Rome… (Yes, do go on…) It was bio energy healing this time. She didn’t touch me for a full hour and I fell asleep half way through. She’s a highly regarded practitioner with a solid reputation so I went with her. Was it worth it? There’s no way of knowing. At this stage. Friends have experienced remarkable results. Some people have even left their bodies! I wanted some of that. That didn’t happen to me unfortunately although I was incredibly relaxed afterwards. Since she didn’t lay a hand on me and I had my eyes closed and covered up the whole time,I did at times wonder if she was in the room with me at all!
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